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Diaryland

I Start Fires!

Lexiroth
Her Rainess
Lizsama
'Cedez
Moonie
Pipey
Timofsky
Motro
Squeeky
Lady Maverick
DM
Shoisies
Chokie

2002-05-05

Piggy's specs were nicked at: 12:49 p.m.

Ah, spring. When flowers poke their tender heads through the fertile soil, when birds burst into song to please their mates, when wobbly-legged colts take their first few stumbling steps, and when Toronto rent rates get jacked up.

David and I didn't escape -- our rent went up 25 bucks. I'm not in a panic. It could be worse. But God, when our landlords called to say they were coming down to "talk about a few things", several possibilites went through my mind:

1) "Get out."

2) "Get some furniture."

3) "Your bathroom's hygenic state is a disgrace to snakes."

4) "We're getting a divorce and selling this place."

5) "For the love of Jesus Mary and St Joseph, stop playing Playstation at 2 a.m."

Instead, it was the rent hike, leaving lights on and upping utility bills (no, their doing laundry every day has nothing to do with that), stop walking on the lawn, and some other shit the neighbours snitched on us about. It wasn't too bad altogether.

A new fad is sweeping the IRC nation! Join us, sisters. It's "Making fun of David Gonterman!"

Gonterman is a 32 year old obsessed with furries and Sonic the Hedgehog. Yscaldine and Lizsama's worst fears must've courted and had a baby, because this guy is unreal. At first glance, his fancomics are decently drawn. But what you don't realize is that your eyes are automatically crusting up as a defence mechanism. Clear away the crud and try to actually read the stuff. Along with having a less-than-subtle dislike for blacks and homosexuals, Gonterman also appears to harbour a fear of the human anatomy, since his drawings all look like a city full of Staypuft marshmallow men.

If your eyes start to bleed, switch over to his latest fanfics which usually cross over two or more of the following: Sailor Moon, Sonic the Hedgehog, Secret of NIMH, Rescue Rangers, or any Disney female.

You can look at his stuff. Or you can read one of the many fansites dedicated to unravelling this human enigma. Or you can do Both! I recommend the latter. The commentary by Strider Hiryu, Roger Smith and the Gundam W pilots is not to be missed. Jesus Christ is no slouch, either.

Now we're off to my parents' house for some BARBEQUE!